Although I’m the apple of Rob’s eye, every once in a while I think he hates having some conversations with me … and here we go:
<Rob enters room which Ikea has obviously just exploded>
Me: Oh! oh! oh! Look Rob! I got those new glasses we were talking about!
Rob: Don’t we have somewhere around 30 glasses?
Me: Um, I guess technically. But these are the ones WE SAID that we really needed. See, we have the large glasses, and the short juice glasses, and the large thick glasses to be kept cold, and WE realised that we need medium sized glasses for beverages in which we drank not quite as little as juice but not as much as water. Right?
Me: Would you like an orange Fanta?
Not that I mean to invite you all into our bedroom, but here’s another example … <enter bedroom>
Me: pst. hey. are you awake?
Me: really? because you seem awake
Rob: *ugh* yes
Me: tell me seven things you love about me!
Rob: huh? Seven? What are you talking about? Where did you get seven?
Me: well, I figured that 10 was too many that you certainly wouldn’t answer and two isn’t enough things for you to love about me.
Rob: *exaggerated* ZZZZZZZ