Mommie Dearest

Dear Mother Nature  – if you don’t knock this craziness off I’m going to stop recycling …

I’ll admit, that is a completely empty threat.  I don’t actually recycle to begin with – unless you count the times I put my empty soda cans (read: trash) on “Ody’s” desk so she can recycle them.  Frankly it was the only way I could think of to get her to stop taking my trash out of the can and recycling its content – which was a daily can of diet cola (i use cola in this sentence on purpose.  i am very cheap and will buy the least expensive diet cola – always).

My beef with you, ms nature, are these allergies in which I have recently been inflicted.  I went many years with only being allergic to cats and the occasional food item that I really just did not want to eat (it has been hard to explain my ham specific allergy while eating bacon).  This past year has become a pollen and dander induced explosion on my system to the nth degree.  Last year is when I started my self-medication, mistakenly with Clariton.  If anyone attended meetings with my from June 2nd through June 26th of 2009 and saw me dozing off it is purely because I did not realize that this choice drug caused drowsiness.  It wasn’t until I sought treatment for narcolepsy that this was found out.  I then discovered the wonder of Zyrtec – in its little white jar with bright green cap.  It became my saving grace.  There was only one thing that upset me about Zyrtec -that in addition to selling it in bulk, they sold it in packs of 7.  Who on earth is SOOO lucky that they need only 7 tiny white tablets to make their summer bearable?  If you, who is reading this, fits in this category of “can just buy the 7-pack and be fine” consider us no longer friends … or at least until the fall, and that’s only if you’re a Cornhusker.  Last week I ran out of my jumbo box of “save-my-life-in-the-summer-because-otherwise-i-won’t-be-able-to-stop-sneezing” medicine.  I mistakenly thought I would be fine to just quit cold turkey.  I spent all of two days sneezing every other second, sniffling all day because of the sneezing, and my eyes were so puffy and watery that now everyone thinks I’ve been crying (and mind you, I don’t cry).  I finally bucked up and bought another economy jar of Wal-tec – which is the Walgreens version of Zyrtec.  It now sits proudly next to my “Walgreens Diet Refreshing Cola” which yes, it does taste $0.75 better than the diet coke would have.

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